Art of Dying Art of Dying_Volume III_joomag | Page 83

can look out the window at the mountains?” Would you rather be back in the bedroom where it's quieter?" If your loved one can't communicate well, lay in their bed and see what the view is. Will recessed lights shine in their eyes? Will they look into a bathroom door with people walking in and out? Can they see the mountains? Dying is the event for the remaining family and friends. For the dying person, their evolutionary path is the event —crossing the bridge into another dimension. It's fuzzy what's going to happen to us after we die. The important thing is to give someone the best possible chance to have the best landing. It's like they're shooting off in a rocket. Let's help them land in the best possible way on the path that's right for them. That path may be Buddhist, it may be Catholic, it may be scientific. But everybody wants to be loved. Everyone wants to be safe and at peace. Everyone wants to be in control, especially when you're sick, and everybody's been controlling you for the past couple of months. To assure someone they are in control, that they can leave their physical body when it no longer serves them, is helpful for everyone, no matter what they believe. I’ve found that as the physical body declines, the spiritual activity increases. Consciousness is still in the body, but they're starting to have out-of-body experiences. They talk with deceased loved ones. I let them know they’re in a safe space. They’ll smile and say, "I just saw my husband." I'll ask, "How did that make you feel? Are you looking forward to being with him again?" Others often dismiss them as drug-induced hallucinations. I don’t question them. I want to die a good death when I can still communicate, take care of my business, show gratitude, forgive people that need to be forgiven, and be physically comfortable to focus on my spiritual journey. I will have said my good-byes, so people don't have to say, "Good-bye," to me. No crying, no tears, no regrets. I don't want anyone hanging all over me and I don't want 10 people sitting around the room waiting and checking their watches. I want to simply say, “Good- bye," and go quietly into a room with a loved one to transition. And that will be it. SUSAN BUHLMAN is an experienced hospice caregiver. As a certified end-of-life doula, it is her passion and her soul’s purpose to provide comfort to those who are actively dying. As a companion to those in the final hours or days of life, she offers a calming, compassionate presence and, if the patient is open to it, Susan guides him or her through a transitional preparation process. Guided visualizations, positive affirmations, Hemi-Sync® and energy healing are a few of the tools that are used to ease the emotional pain and fear of the dying process. During bereavement workshops, she uses spiritual principles to lessen the burden of loss, leading the way toward a peaceful appreciation of the next conscious steps in our soul’s journey. She has co-authored a book Higher Self Now! with her husband, William Buhlman. Together, they lead workshops to assist others in their quest to develop their personal spiritual transition. WWW.ASTRALINFO.ORG. From a conversation with John Wadsworth VOLUME III | 83